I got a chance to read a bit on the flight we took recently. The US Airways September 2007 issue had some insights on happiness worth thinking about. The editor, Lance Elko, began the issue with his own letter in which he quoted:
Happiness is a mystery, like religion, and should never be rationalized. G. K. Chesterton
He went on to say:
We all know what happiness feels like, but it is, after all, something of an abstract idea. What is happiness to you? Emotional joy? Personal comfort? A wonderful relationship? Financial security? Good health? A great house and car?
Maybe all these things factor in, to some degree, and the percentages might change on any given day. Certainly some level of personal comfort and good health seem requisite. But oftentimes we take these things for granted and other incidentals take on precedence to make us less likely to experience happiness in the moment. We forget the good things and focus on the things that need change. Or, for someone in a bad relationship, being free of any relationship might constitute happiness. For someone else, what they need to feel happy is to be engaged in working out a solution to a problem or an issue -- they feel more alive than if they are coasting.
It may be a fact that what is one person's happiness could be another person's bane. I'm thinking of hearing a SA telling a customer that she told her daughter that she would watch her grandchild until s/he got mobile, then she wasn't going to/wasn't capable of it. Another grandmother might make a different choice. One of my joys is my grandchild. Just hearing the way she thinks is a joy.
And it might also be that happiness per se is not something we feel every single moment of every day. It could be in the background or it might be something we fight for. It might be moments we feel in the midst of all the stuff that goes on, those moments when we feel good even if.
Elko goes on to say:
happiness is being rationalized by modern science. "A Formula for Happiness" (page 66) looks at the growing field of positive psychology and explores a methodology that helps us better understand why we might be -- or not be -- in good spirits.
Turning to that article by Liz Seymour, I was interested in being reacquainted with the idea of a set-point for happiness. It does seem a bit unfair that happiness comes easier to some folks than to others. To me, it becomes a demonstration for the ones for whom it is more difficult -- and that is something to recognize and appreciate.
Are you happy? If you're like 90% of Americans, you probably answer "yes" to that question, at least most of the time. But are you as happy as you could be? If not, how could you be happier? And what is happiness anyway?
Since I tend to fight for my happiness and consciously try to be aware of and add to it in my days, that made me laugh. I can almost guarantee that worrying about one's level of happiness will not add to it. Of course, recognizing where we could do better, either in recognizing it or in bringing it about, can be part of finding it.
Then, the adage, be careful what you ask for, you might get it. It might not make you as happy as you think.
I remember a time when someone asked a mentor how s/he could be happy. S/he wanted a spouse and children. His response, which made us all laugh, was: Stay single. Then a few years later, the same person said: I ignored your advice, what do I do now? To a great deal of laughter, he said: Since you ignored my best advice...then he went on to speak more seriously. We all recognized ourselves somewhere in that question, maybe not over the same issues.
What they discovered can be expressed in a surprisingly simple formula: H=S+C+V, or Level of Happiness = Set Point + Conditions of Your Life + Volunteer Activities.
"Our formulation of happiness, which we call subjective well-being, says that it is composed of life satisfaction, positive emotions, and low levels of negative emotions. We used to examine what causes happiness, but recently wse have begun to examine what happiness itself causes. Is it just a good thing? How does it influence our motivation and behavior? " Ed Diener, professor of psychology at the University of Illinois
I like to think that a lot of progress takes place in life because folks are not so happy with the status quo and are willing to work for something different, even in the face of opposition or derision. They persevere. We benefit.
Stay tuned for more from this article.
How do you define happiness? Do you consider yourself happy? Does it even matter to you? Is life simply what it is?
Some of my definitions, in no particular order: something to think about, a little friendship, some good meals, health, being around children (and sometimes not, LOL), perfume, doing something creative, music, nature, rain...
Funnily, I just found a Fortune Cookie fortune that my youngest daughter had kept: You should let go of negative things today.
Karin
Originally posted 2007-09-15 08:42:10.
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