There is a famous prayer often called the Serenity Prayer. Sometimes we simply have to accept what is, while we work it out in thought and prayer, trying to figure out what is the difference between what we must accept and what we must try to change.

Waiting for a Chinese adoption right now falls into this category. But so do a lot of other things.

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
–Reinhold Niebuhr

Life Lessons: Two Experts on Death and Dying Teach Us About the Mysteries of Life and Living has an interesting chapter on surrender. The book also has chapters on Authenticity, Love, Relationships, Loss, Power, Guilt, Time, Fear, Anger, Play, Patience, Forgiveness and Happiness.

In letting go, we release our mental pictures of how things should turn out and accept what the universe brings us. We accept that we don’t really know how things should be. (p 186)

…surrender [is] a choice, and … it [does] not mean giving up… When we surrender, we accept it just as it is…to see that we always have choices, in every situation, is surrender. To turn away from a situation is to give up. To turn into it is surrender. (p 188-189)

Sometimes we have to turn into the wind in order to take advantage of it. The wind is going to blow anyway. The question is what are we going to do while it does?

…conditions may never change, which makes us victims of their not changing. To say, ‘I will only be peaceful if such and such happens’ is pretty limiting…I’m not talking about accepting everything that happens. If you don’t like the television show you’re watching, you don’t have to surrender to it — change the channel.

…I’m talking about situations we have decided are insurmountable obstacles to happiness….Surrendering into life as it is can be the quickest and most powerful way to get the lesson out of the situation. You can’t change your bad childhood, but you can have a good life… you can stop wasting your time and energy [on things that won't change]…[it] doesn’t mean that life is over.

…if happiness is possible tomorrow, it is also possible today. If love is possible tomorrow, it is possible today. (p 188-193)

If we have to get through a situation in order to get to the other side, then we simply have to do it, a day at a time, making each day count as best we can, making choices for happiness even as we walk the path. Nobody can tell you what works for you, but you can find it for yourself. Don’t let a day go by without finding some happiness in it. Take a moment to notice the good things around you.

…live every day to its fullest. When was the last time you really looked at the sea? Or smelled the morning? … to see the stars… to gaze out on the ocean. Many of us live near the ocean but never take the time to look at it. We all live under the stars, but do we look up at the sky? Do we really touch and taste life, do we see and feel the extraordinary, especially in the ordinary? (p 224)

There are wonderful moments waiting in this day. Go for it!

Karin

Originally posted 2007-06-14 18:25:50.

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Adoption, Just thinking, Prayer, Quotations, Spirituality and God