I recently came across this article.
It is well written article and informative to tuck into your arsenal of awareness.
Some things that I would point out:
**most of the diagnoses go hand in glove to some extent — if there is one diagnosis, it usually isn’t alone…and healing comes on all fronts as they begin to be addressed.
**trust your gut instinct if you are concerned.
**it is important to talk to your child about where their feelings come from early on, perhaps even before you think they are old enough to understand — you are not planting something in their heads, but empowering them.
**memories (body memories, if they are earlier than spoken language)while seeming to be latent can have an effect if the child does not understand…what we believe about our own childhood can continue to influence us even if the belief is not based on anything actual. (Someone I know, for example, felt displaced as a child when a sib was born, but this was their feeling, as they say, they were never treated as lesser. But their old feelings still linger as an adult.)
**Let them know that it might be something that affects them their whole life to some extent, but that they will understand where it comes from so that they can deal with it on the level of understanding. It is more fearful to have the feelings, but not know why. It then becomes something they can control vs. controlling them.
An example: if your child has a visceral need for food, never make food an issue, but begin to tell them that it likely goes back to when they did not have access to food at all times. At the same time it is not something they have to worry about now. Teach them how to react in public to food. Teach them early to cook. Let them be in charge of food. Maybe they will work in the food industry. Their relief is palpable when they are given some control.
It can be eye opening to discern how deeply a relatively short time can affect one’s whole life. But it doesn’t have to be negative. It’s normal to their experience. We walk the path with them so they aren’t alone.
Karin
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Adoption, Just thinking, Parenting
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